I was planning to sit and write a post about our lovely day at the zoo – nothing like a photo or two of a giraffe to bring a smile to a face. But I’ve been inspired to write a short post about feminism.
I’m not mounting a political platform to talk about women’s rights – there are far better women treading that ground and I thank them for it. But feminism isn’t simple something to talk about at a political level, elevated to a status of a ‘debateable topic’.
I saw the piece from ex Tory MP Louise Mensch talking about how she sees dressing to be attractive to her husband as an ‘act of kindness’ and in turn the outpouring of outrage - many viewing it as a submissive betrayal. This is a woman of power making a choice, sexual attraction, reactive and proactive isn’t anti-feminist. A sexually dominant woman is no more a feminist than a sub – if that’s their choice/preference.
What isn’t clear is whether he feels the same way and dresses to be sexually attractive to her – I hope so. Feminism is not to be confused with femininity, surely it’s about wearing a skirt if you want to and earning the same in the boardroom as male colleagues. When I go to work I wear a dress, mainly because I feel good in it. I often undo the top button on a shirt because it feels better and I invest in new under wear because, one, I need to, and two I like to make an effort. Just like I expect him in doors to buy new boxers and pluck his nose hair. It’s an acknowledgement of our relationship, mentally and physically.
Choice is our ultimate weapon and we need to keep striving for this. Louise was able to say this because amazing women and movements have made it more possible for her to have a high profile career. Look good for your husband, boyfriend, girlfriend, cat – I really don’t care. But let’s keep moving toward a world where all women have that as a choice not something forced on us.